#10: Who Am I?

For a long time I really struggled with knowing who I was. I got to a point where I forgot who I was. It was a long journey to find myself. Then I started working with a group that was all about changing your mindset. So I dived in and learned all I could. I was like a sponge, soaking up all this information. Then came the fun part. Applying it to me and my life. Applying it to my way of thinking. I realized that I couldn't be who I wanted to be if I didn't recognize the things I was. How can you be something if you don't know what you want to be? How can you attain a goal if you don't have one yet? And so I decided to make a list of who I thought I was. For a while it was a blank page, I put a lot into seriously thinking about this. And in the beginning my mindset was, "What do I need to change in my life to make me a better person? To make me wonderful? To make me somebody to be loved?"

What I learned, however, is that I was already those things. The negative, the things I hated at the time, was like a coat that I just simply needed to take off. The positive was already there. Granted it still took a lot of work to take away things I didn't like, but it gave me a new outlook. It gave me hope. How easy is it to just take something off. Imagine carrying weights on your arm. Is it simpler to just remove some instead of adding more on?

Here is my list of the things I believe I am. Try writing one yourself. It will be an eye opener for you. It will give you quite a bit of encouragement to continue facing each day with courage. And it really doesn't matter who else sees what you are. All that really matters is how YOU see who you are.

• I am love. I have to be love because I love people.
• I am fun. I love to be with people and I have a good sense of humor.
• I am strong. I have been able to master many trials and challenges in my life.
• I am life. I am here, breathing, heart beating. I can share my life and I can give life to people.
• I am good. I have the gift and power to be like Christ.
• I am my goals. My goals created the person I want and need to be.
• I am my feelings of positive self-worth. I am who I have created.
• I am a piece of artwork. my life is a canvas. I have had the opportunity to paint over anything I do not want to stay. It is still there, but nobody knows it unless I tell them. It's like a little boy painted in a tree in a picture. And then an artist painting leaves over the tree. Nobody can see him, but he's still there.
• I am beautiful. I can use my beauty to create beautiful things.
• I am brave. I can face things that aren't always fun to face, but I can do it anyway.
• I am light. I can make the way brighter for myself and for other people who are searching for their light. I can light their candle, and still keep my light too. They will be able to share it with others.

I wrote this list in 2008. Two years later, I have learned much more about myself. If I were to write a new list, I would imagine it would be pages longer. I am glad I know who I am.

#4: My Personal Bill of Rights

1. I have the right to ask for what I want.
2. I have the right to say no to requests or demands I can't meet.
3. I have the right to express all of my feelings, positive or negative.
4. I have the right to change my mind.
5. I have the right to make mistakes and not have to be perfect.
6. I have the right to follow my own values and standards.
7. I have the right to say no to anything when I feel I am not ready, it is unsafe, or it violates my values.
8. I have the right to determine my own priorities.
9. I have the right not to be responsible for others' behavior, actions, feelings, or problems.
10. I have the right to expect honesty from others.
11. I have the right to be angry at someone I love.
12. I have the right to be uniquely myself.
13. I have the right to feel scared and say "I'm scared."
14. I have the right to say "I don't know."
15. I have the right not to give excuses or reasons for my behavior.
    
16. I have the right to make decisions based on my feelings.
17. I have the right to my own needs for personal space and time.
18. I have the right to be playful and frivolous.
19. I have the right to be healthier than those around me.
20. I have the right to be in a non-abusive environment.
21. I have the right to make friends and be comfortable around people.
22. I have the right to change and grow.
23. I have the right to have my needs and wants respected by others.
24. I have the right to be treated with dignity and respect.
25. I have the right to be happy.