#5: Take Risks

~RISKS~

To laugh is to risk appearing the fool.

To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.

To reach out for another is to risk involvement.

To expose your feelings is to risk exposing your true self.

To place your ideas and your dreams before the crowd is to risk their loss.

To love is to risk not being loved in return.

To live is to risk dying.

To hope is to risk despair.

To try is to risk failure.

But risks must be taken, because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing. The person who risks nothing does nothing, has nothing, and is nothing. He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he simply cannot learn, feel, change, grow, love, or live. Chained by his certitudes, he is a slave, he has forfeited his freedom.

#2: Courage vs Fear

Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear.

~Mark Twain

The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines courage as: "Mental or moral strength to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear, or difficulty." Wikiquotes.com says, "Courage, also known as fortitude, is the ability to confront fear, pain, danger, uncertainty, or intimidation." Both of these are excellent descriptions of the word courage. I used to be one of those people who believed that in order to have courage, I had to have absolutely no fear. I wore myself into the ground trying to "be brave", trying to have no fear. And then I suffered because there were just some things that plain scared me, no matter how much I tried to work through that fear. That's when I started researching what it really means to have courage. I love how Mark Twain says that courage is the mastery of fear. It's just putting yourself in charge of how the fear effects you, it's ok to be afraid once in a while. Courage comes when you say to yourself, "I feel afraid when certain events happen in my life, and it's ok." It's all about learning how to manage your fear.

One of the greatest teachers I had in college, Judie Erickson, once said to me that fear is nothing more than:

False

Events

Appearing

Real

Fear can actually save us from harmful situations. It keeps us safe. One of the best books I have ever read is called The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Becker. He talks about how the feeling of fear warns us when we are about to find ourselves in a dangerous situation. It sparks something within us that causes us to think twice about the next step we make. Thinking back on some of the most difficult situations in my past, the feeling of fear was an excellent prediction of what was to come. And although I wasn't as in tune with my feelings then as I am now, I at least realized later how to recognize those feelings. And since then I have averted many potentially harmful situations. The most important thing is to face your fears, but only those fears that will strengthen you as a person. And just the act of facing your fears will be enough to call yourself courageous.